


We'll Have To Start Again

by Jmoney



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-29
Updated: 2014-03-29
Packaged: 2018-01-17 10:26:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1384105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jmoney/pseuds/Jmoney
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis felt cold, empty, and detached. He felt stupid. Stupid enough to let some boy with sparkling emerald eyes and bouncy chestnut curls destroy his life completely. Ok maybe he was exaggerating about the destroying his life part, but he was hurt nonetheless.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We'll Have To Start Again

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally was supposed to be written over my Christmas break which is the time this fic took place, but things don't always work according to plan. So just keep in mind the time frame.

11:59 read the clock and still no tweet. Not even a text. Now Louis could say he was hurt, but that would be an understatement. Browsing through his timeline on twitter didn't make him feel any better considering all the tweets were of Harry at some pub. Harry's behavior lately had Louis questioning everything about their relationship. Was it really worth it to stay and see pictures of Harry out with other guys again and again. He didn’t even bother to tell Louis about it, let alone warn him. Harry blowing off Louis' birthday made Louis want to go blow off some steam of his own. He needed an outlet to release all this pent up aggression he had building. His eyes stung and he curled into himself. He broke into ugly sobs until he eventually passed out.

**

Exhausted from the pub, Harry collapsed on his bed at his mom’s house. He was happy to be home and on break. He hadn’t seen his family in ages and he wasn’t going to let the opportunity to spend time with them go to waste. Before he could doze off there was a faint knocking at the door, “Come in” Harry breathed. Gemma leisurely walked in then lied down beside him. “How was the pub?” she asked. “Good, nice to see old faces I haven’t seen in a while ya know?” “No I don’t superstar, some of us actually are settled and aren’t always on the move.” Harry chuckled at that. “Anyways I came in here to ask you why you aren’t with Louis tonight?” “I wanted to use my break to spend time with you guys, he understands that.” “So he was also very understanding of you spending time here with us than with him on his birthday?” Harry’s eyes shot open and he looked at Gemma panicked. “Harry you didn’t!” Gemma’s eyes looked like they were about to bulge out. "Please tell me you're joking" he pleaded more with himself than with her. "I wish I was" she said softly. Harry was scrambling to his feet and getting his footing together. He was off the bed in a dash and headed for the stairs. "Fuck, fuck, fuck" he kept chanting this mantra as he left his mom's place and headed to his and Louis' house.

**  
Louis felt cold, empty, and detached. He felt stupid. Stupid enough to let some boy with sparkling emerald eyes and bouncy chestnut curls destroy his life completely. Ok maybe he was exaggerating about the destroying his life part, but he was hurt nonetheless. And he hated that even though Harry had caused this pain he wanted nothing more than to be in Harry's arms right now. He felt pathetically stupid for even crying about Harry especially on his birthday of all days. It wasn't fair the hold Harry held over him. He wanted to blame Harry for this, but he had no one to blame but himself. He wished he hadn't been so vulnerable and hadn't been so willing to tear down his walls for Harry because every layer of Louis Harry pulled back it was something he could destroy Louis with later. His thoughts kept running rampant with these thoughts until he heard a creak at the door. He turned and saw the devil himself.

**  
Harry creaked open the door to his and Louis' bedroom and saw him lying there crying. Harry's heart sank and guilt began to consume him. Louis looked up at him and his eyes started welling up. Harry rushed to his side to comfort him. "Shh baby shh I'm so sorry, I'm so fucking sorry" he hiccuped in his ear. Louis was shaking with sobs in his arms. Harry really fucked up this time. He had never seen Louis in this state and he'd seen Louis at his most vulnerable before. But this, nothing compared to this. Louis looked broken and it was all Harry's fault. Harry climbed behind Louis on the bed and cuddled him, rocking him back and forth. He kept at it until Louis' sobs quieted down. He heard Louis' breath even out, but he still held Louis very closely to him. "I'm sorry fucking sorry Lou, it was never my intention to forget your birthday" he whispered closely to Louis' ear. Harry nuzzled into Louis' neck until Louis removed Harry's hands off his body and got up and left the room. Harry laid there in shock.

**  
Louis sat himself on the living room couch staring dejectedly at the blank television screen. He heard footsteps approach him and felt a dip on the couch. "I can't keep doing this H" he said aloud not really hearing himself. "What can't you keep doing?" He asked. "This. Us." He gestured between them. "Louis, no please don't do this" it sounded strangled coming out of him. "I can't keep giving myself to you and you not giving me back anything in return" he breathed. "No Louis no I know I forgot your birthday but I have given you my all." Louis shook his head sadly, "You've been pushing me away, haz this has been happening long before my birthday and you know it" "I don't want to be in a relationship when it's obviously clear you don't want one." Harry furiously grabbed Louis' face in between his hands, forcing Louis to make eye contact with "You think I don't want to be with you because I've been distant" he rubbed Louis' cheek, "I want you more than anything and I've been distant because I'm an idiot." "I hate what we have to be in public, I hate that I can't show the world you're mine. So when I'm reminded of that, I direct my anger towards you and create a distance" "It's stupid, it's so fucking stupid that I do that, but I don't know how else to deal sometimes." "I guess it's me trying to escape it sometimes, the world where you can't be mine" he rests his forehead on Louis', "it's stupid and it's selfish and it isn't fair to you and I'm sorry." Louis was sniffling now, "You know you could've just talked to me, you know I would understand." "You didn't have to keep pushing me away and hurting me each and every time. Harry you hurt me a lot." Harry pecked his forehead, "I know I'm the biggest fucking twat, I don't know what the fuck I was thinking when I did that and I regret it so much" Louis ran a hand through Harry's curls, "Please don't do it again" Harry knew there was more meaning behind this than Louis just asking Harry to not distance himself. It was him pleading Harry to promise Louis he wouldn't hurt him again. And he could do that, he could do that because Louis was to precious to lose. He crushed his lips onto Louis', a teeth clattering kiss with so much urgency neither of them card. Harry broke away and searched Louis' eyes, "I promise you I will never do it again, ever." He kissed Louis with much more softness and care this time. Things would be rocky now, but they'd figure it out. They were it for each other, they were Harry and Louis. There would be ups and downs, but they'd get through it because they loved each other. They could conquer anything together really.

**Author's Note:**

> Alright so I hope you enjoyed this little disaster I wrote. Keep in mind it was my first time at writing so I understand if it didn't run as smoothly. Thanks for reading. Probably won't write ever again.


End file.
